Space Aliens Make Deposits in Sperm Banks!

BONN, Germany - Cagey space aliens are making donations to hundreds of unsuspecting sperm banks here on Earth - in a sinister scheme to conquer our planet without ever firing a shot!

That chilling revelation was made by famed physicist and UFO researcher Dr. Gerhard Dietzer, who says evil E.T.s hope to infiltrate our population - and eventually wipe out the entire human race - by interbreeding with Earthlings every chance they get.

"They want our planet for themselves, but they're intelligent enough not to wage a war that would destroy everything the Earth has to offer," Dr. Dietzer told a conference on intergalactic travel.

"So they plan to take over by mixing their genes with ours to the point that we Earthlings eventually disappear from our own planet and the whole place is populated by aliens.

"There has been so much interbreeding already that it's almost impossible to know whether your neighbor - or the person sitting at the next desk - is a pureblood Earthling, part Earthling and part extraterrestrial, or a pureblood extraterrestrial."

And these shifty visitors from another world are making donations to sperm banks in America, Europe and Asia as part of their weasely scheme, the expert said.

"Their ability to assume a humanoid appearance and humanoid mannerisms has made it possible for them to actually marry and breed with Earthlings," the Swiss scientist said.

"But for the past three years, they've also been making massive contributions to our sperm banks to speed the process along - and they consider these donations to be a key part of their grand design.

"Again, their talent for blending in with the general population makes it easy for them to create the necessary credentials and pass off their sperm as human sperm. So it's highly likely that thousands of sperm bank moms here on Earth are actually cuddling little alien babies to their breasts."

Dr. Dietzer, who claims to have been in contact with visitors from faraway planets for more than two decades, says the crafty creatures believe they can control our planet completely within a hundred years.

"To us, a hundred years may seem like a long time, but to these guys it's like the blink of an eye," he said.